Pure Boredom

OMG...the BOREDEOM of it all!!!!!! I'm seriously dying here at the office with nothing to do. I've made all the calls...I've finished the report of yesterday's meeting and now I'm stuck with nothing to do. I've done everything that needs to be done and I'm really feeling bored right now.

Finally I understand Sip Chen's belly aching about being bored in the office. Seriously, please just give me something to do. It doesn't seem nice to be seating here reading my book although I'm really itching to continue reading it. There's nothing much to surf online, since I really have no idea what to surf for anyway.

That's it. The moment the clock turns 5.30pm, I'll punch my card and walk out the door. Oh the boredom...the BOREDOM.....

Love and Light...RIP

I got the news of MJ's death on the radio in the car this morning. By the time I reached the office my Facebook and Twitter pages were already flooded with condolences from friends and by noon memorial signing for him was already set up on FB. His death pretty much over shadowed the news of Farrah Fawcett's passing, who is more likely to be remembered in the 1970's Charlie's Angels.

Being brought up with MJ's songs (and country songs and oldies) and my parents reminiscing about the TV series Charlie's Angels, I wish I could say that I mourned with the other millions the lost of two talents; but the only thing that ran through my mind was 'go out and LIVE your life'. The same thing that ran through my mind when I got to know about Catherine's passing.

There's so many things in the past, which I wish I did or at least had the guts to do. Most of the time, my gutsy feeling kicks in just a little too late. So yeah, here I am on a Friday determined to make a new resolution (even if it is a little too late into the year). From now on, it's about making the best of things and not over thinking stuff. And maybe...just maybe...I'll learn to swallow a bit more of my pride and not let it stand in the way of something I've sworn I've learned my lesson from close ones; where too late is all about regrets and bittersweet memories locked in a drawer, brought out once in a while drawing nothing but tears and pain.

First In Line

There's so many things on my mind. Being swamped with work doesn't seem to be helping much in pushing them out. Most of the time they lurk somewhere at the back despite my needing my utmost attention at work.

So what's a girl gotta do? OK well been listening to Matthew Mayfield - First In Line over and over again for the past two days. Pathetic? Yup I hear ya. If my Ipod could say something it would have long since told me to change to another song or just kill it already. But the thing is that the song kind of have this really calming effect.

I really can't wait for Sainty to get here next month. We've both already have the whole evening planned out. Dinner, a bottle of wine or champagne and a whole night of catching up over the past year. So many things have happened since we've left high school. Sometimes I wonder if I really am my age or should I be older because of all that has happened.

Igrid Michaelson

I've always loved this song...and I just loved this version by Igrid Michaelson. Those who watch OTH would know this song from Lucas' and Peyton's wedding ceremony.

In Loving Memory of Teacher Catherine Yong

We are reminded how fragile our lives are everytime someone we know passes away. How sudden deaths make us stop in our tracks and reexamine our lives. We realize once again how short life is...that it takes not only the old but the young as well. That at this young age, we aren't invincible after all.

I don't have much memories of Teacher Cath, since I was only in SFX for a year and a half. So unlike my other ex-schoolmates, I didn't have the privilege of being taught by her, except the privilege of knowing her. It's sad that only now, being much older do I actually start to appreciate my teachers back in school. Only now do I realize that their sarcasm didn't really matter much because they were the ones that normally got me all fired up to prove them wrong. Darn reverse psychology! *smiles*

Hearing about her passing just reopened all those worries and fears. It reminded me to live. To appreciate the people around me and to let those I love know how much they mean to me and how much I love them. I never want the regret of never having told someone how much they've meant to me. I don't want knowing that I let pride stand in my way and never get back something again because it was too late. I just want to live and feel alive.

I hope her soul is at peace and that her husband and family find solace from the love and support of relatives and friends.

The Right Time

There are times in life when the rule 'The Right Time' does not apply. When you need to just follow your heart and take the plunge into whatever it is that brings you happiness. I didn't use to think that way, and I thought Bren crazy when she told me she was getting married the same day I got to know she was in a relationship. She then proceeded to ask me, "So when is the right time?" I replied her, "Later". She prompted me again, "When is later? There would always be a later. There's no such thing as the right time. It feels right now..."

Today chatting with Michelle on Facebook reminded me again about that conversation. It's true...when is the right time? There's always reasons to not do something, to say it isn't the right time even if everything is already in place. Spontaneity might not necessarily be spontaneous if you get what I mean. Like Bren, Mich followed her heart. I thought it was a joke when I saw her status on FB. In her place, I would not have had the guts to do it. Even with the right guy, I doubt I would have because being me, my heart and my mind always say two different things. But Michelle, she followed her heart, grabbed this wonderful chance to be with the person who completes her...and is getting hitched in Chile this Thursday. I really can't be any more happy for her than what I feel now.

Yup...that's the happy couple. Michelle looks so radiantly happy here...and of course this picture was taken before the engagement. But she looks so blissfully happy here...just like the very person who found the right one.

I've seen missed chances. I've seen time so short, that everything was gone in a blink of the eye. I've seen regrets and wishes of turning back time. I've seen people left with only bittersweet memories. It's not what I would want for myself. But sometimes, I do see myself heading in that direction...and that scares me and makes me more paranoid than what I already am *smiles*

And back to Bren...well she's happily married with twin boys who can't be any more adorable. So yes...when is the right time? They took the chance and they're both as happy as can be. I'm not ready to get married (God FORBID!), but I am ready and would want to take the plunge into whatever that makes me happy. There really isn't the right time...the perfect time...because the heart knows what feels right...what it is to feel home and happy, the mind just debates the rationale of it...but when all you feel is content, maybe it is the time to tell the mind to slow down and just embrace what the heart knows what feels perfectly right.


*Mich...sorry...pinjam first la your picture with Miguel.