final words of 2008

The last day of 2008. It's been a really long year...too long. I really can't wait to just move on to 2009 and start fresh. But seriously, I'm scared what 2009 has to offer and letting go of what has happened in 2008. I'm nervous, but I've also made a pact with someone about it being a new year and a new beginning.

Someone once said that when you open yourself up, you let the bad in with the good. This year seems to be filled with so much of the bad things, that I sometimes wonder if it had been better to be all closed up and just go on with the typical normal life I had, all busy with college, club activities, tutoring and hanging out with friends. Summer really changed everything. And summer would also have to be where all the problems began. But summer was also filled with the most amazing of things. It just went downhill as winter set in.

I learned a lot this year. It was a tough year, and not only for me, but it was a year that taught me to appreciate the things that happened as well. I wouldn't have traded summer for anything. But I can't deny that if given the option, I would change the things that has happened beginning from summer. Or maybe even given the chance, I would relive 2008 again. Still, I did the best I could in every situation, even when it didn't feel like it was the right thing, I did the best I could.

New year, new beginning. I never knew that pact would be one of the most difficult to keep. Even when it is for the best, it's the hardest thing. Letting go just seems too final.

Goodbye 2008. It's been a real tough year...and who would have thought it really wasn't my year after all. Not as I had thought it was *smile*